Monthly Archives: May 2009

Interview with Amity Buxton, Founder

We want to thank David Perry and Comcast Hometown Channel for the wonderful interview he did with Amity Buxton which appeared recently on the program “10 percent”. They discuss gay marriage, and the straight spouse experience. Amity recounts her moving experience of her first marriage, and the state of closeted denial which her husband maintained. This led to the founding of the Straight Spouse Network, because there was no support at the time for straight spouses. It’s an interesting interview, and will give you some perspective on where we come from. Continue reading

Posted in Family Issues, General Information | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Cyber Roses for Marie Osmond

We want to send an appreciative note with some real cyber roses to Marie Osmond. Her recent interview concerning her lesbian daughter touched a lot of hearts here at the Straight Spouse Network. Some of us who have gay and lesbian spouses also find we have a gay or lesbian child. Marie’s response that she loves her daughter and is true to her Mormon faith struck some resonance with many of the people in our network. Continue reading

Posted in Family Issues, Healing and Moving Forward | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

THANK YOU

The Straight Spouse Network sends a big shout out of thanks to entertainer Carmel Quinn and the Knights of Columbus #8982, in residence at St. John’s, Leonia, NJ. Carmel’s May 17 2009 concert raised money for various Knights of Columbus supported charities, including St. John’s Church and School and the Elks Camp Moore. The Straight Spouse Network was not among the advertised charities, but we received a portion of the proceeds from this very entertaining afternoon performance. Continue reading

Posted in General Information, Healing and Moving Forward | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Oops – Did I Say Something Wrong????

Many times family and friends don’t know what to say to the straight spouse when the gay husband or wife either discloses their true sexuality or is discovered and denies the obvious. In the former situation, family and friends of the couple might not want to appear “hateful” toward LGBT people, or they might share profound anger and have no problem expressing it. In the latter situation, they may not want to accept the truth, and aid in the denial.

Very often, people mean to help – but say the wrong thing or are afraid of saying the wrong thing, so they back off, leaving the straight spouse feeling further isolated. So, we’ve compiled this handy dandy list of what to say – and what NOT to say. Continue reading

Posted in Family Issues, Healing and Moving Forward | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Thanks, Amity!

The Straight Spouse Network’s own Amity Buxton recently wrote an article about the film Outrage, and the effect of public outing of closeted homosexuals in public life on families. The article, published in The Advocate, has received much notice and … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Adultery, Straight Spouses, and the Law

It’s been nearly 5 years since gay marriage was first legalized in Massachussetts. Since that time, four other states have followed and other states have laws under consideration. After five years, in Massachussetts, life goes on. Some of the social … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Outrage

Outrage is likely to provoke just that in some circles. The film which is featured at Tribeca Film Festival this week and opens in theaters nationwide today is Kirby Dicks documentary about exposing closeted gay politicians who work against the interests of gays and lesbians.

It is important to realize that some of the people who are forcibly outed in media have spouses and children who are then vilified publicly as well. No matter what reaction they have, there will always be someone who finds fault with them. Continue reading

Posted in Family Issues, General Information | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Infidelity

Straight spouses live with many of the same lies when confronting same sex infidelity as do those whose husbands or wives cheat with someone of the opposite sex. Like John Edwards, they may say “I only did it once” and “It won’t happen again”. In addition, the straight spouse copes with the following: Continue reading

Posted in Family Issues, Healing and Moving Forward | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

The Honeymoon Phase

Immediately post disclosure or discovery, many mixed orientation couples go through what is called the “honeymoon phase”. It’s not a honeymoon that anyone should want! The initial pain of confrontation is past, and the straight spouse has some decisions to make about what the future holds. Continue reading

Posted in Family Issues, General Information | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment