Monthly Archives: September 2009

Glass Houses

Posted on September 27, 2009 by Straight Spouse

Around age seven, a friend of my mother’s moved in with us. By eleven, I had discovered that my mother was gay and that this friend was actually her lover. My mother had been unwilling to just take off with me without seeing if she could get the marriage to work. In the meantime though, she was sleeping with this woman inside our house. I woke up many a night in search of my mother to discover that she was not in bed with my father, but in bed with this woman who was supposed to be my ‘aunt.’
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We’re Famous – Or is That Infamous?

Posted on September 22, 2009 by Straight Spouse

The Straight Spouse Network had a bit of fame this week. After quite a bit of time between interviews, the Associated Press published an article about Amity Buxton and other California Straight Spouses, and their opposition to Prop 8. You can read the widely distributed article here. Nevertheless, among many of our straight spouses, there is a discomfort with supporting gay marriage. It may also be a surprise that we are not a large “gay agenda” funded pro gay group with large donations and professional grant writers. We are a peer to peer support network for straight people who are picking up the pieces of their own lives and that of their families after they discover their husband or wife is gay. We operate on a shoestring and depend on volunteer support. Continue reading →

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How Was It For You?

Posted on September 19, 2009 by Straight Spouse

“How would you feel..” she said, with a smile, “If I had an affair with a woman?”

And so my marriage ended. Actually it ended with the next sentence, when she told me we would just be married friends, and she would be exclusive to her new lover. Continue reading →

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A Rude Awakening

Posted on September 14, 2009 by Straight Spouse

Often when straight spouses try to tell the truth, we are interrupted, sidelined, silenced or mocked. Having people be intensely and unexpectedly rude to us is nothing new. Having our grief minimized and dismissed is also, sadly, somewhat common. As survivors of unimaginable rudeness and hostility, we have some suggestions for the people who have recently been sideswiped in public by bizarre displays of self centered rudeness. Continue reading →

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Mad Men and the Closet

Posted on September 10, 2009 by Straight Spouse

Approximately 2 million men and women have been in Kitty’s role: straight spouse. Mad Men may be set over 40 years ago, but that doesn’t mean the closet has completely opened. Each day more and more people seek support from the Straight Spouse Network. The difference now is that they have somewhere to turn. The difference now is they do not need to stay in their gay spouse’s closet. Continue reading →

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Straight Spouses and Civil Unions in Australia

Posted on September 7, 2009 by Straight Spouse

In Australia, the granting of legal status to civil union committment ceremonies is currently being debated, and members of the general public were invited to submit their statements in support or against to the Australian Federal Government’s Senate Enquiry. Several members of the Straight Spouse Network responded eloquently. Continue reading →

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